Dropping the Coffee
by Killjoyncis
Summary: Killing Ari was the endgame and one that Gibbs was determined to win. But not at the cost of the two people he had come to think of as his surrogate children.


Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who has noticed my little stories and commented on them. I have issues with the discontinuity in Tony Dinozzo's characterization on NCIS and have made it my job to make it all work together. I appreciate all your kind words and encouragements.

Additionally, getting into Gibbs' head space was ridiculously hard. Sigh.

"McGee and I will go….back to the roof, Boss." Gibbs frowned at the sound of his senior field agent's voice. Dinozzo sounded breathy. Hoarse. _Sick._

As if for the first time all day, Gibbs turned and actually looked at his men. He winced at the bedraggled sight. Despite the fact that they were literally sopping wet , he saw no accusation on either face. Not like the encounter he'd just had with Kate: she'd been beautiful, pale, and had come complete with a single gunshot hole in her forehead. She'd condemned his actions, and he deserved everything she said and a thousand times worse. Her safety was his responsibility and her death was on him. He knew this. But as much as part of him wanted to wallow and mourn, now was not the time. So he focused instead on Dinozzo and McGee and realized several things at once.

They were not just soaked, but cold. Despite that, they were struggling on because of him. And Tony's lips were blue. He was pale. Paler than he had been that morning when walking into the bullpen for the first time since his battle with the plague. Paler, even, than he'd been after being nearly blown to bits by the bomb that Ari had planted in the convertible. Christ, had it all been the same day? Gibbs felt like it had been thirty years since the explosion. How had things changed so drastically in a span of mere hours? He knew he should have been better prepared. He knew, probably better than most, the way of the world. People died. Tragedies happened. They were senseless and they were painful and most of the time you never understood why the hell things went so wrong. He hadn't been ready, though, and now he was paying for it.

Dinozzo's body wanted to shiver. Gibbs could see just how much it was costing him to keep still. His jaw looked as though it could break, it was clenched so tightly. Sighing, he turned around. Dinozzo winced, obviously expecting a head slap. No way was that happening. As fragile as Tony looked right now, the lightest touch would send him careening across the room. "Tony. You're soaking wet. Go put some dry clothes on."

For a split second, Tony's eyes met Gibbs'. The younger man's gaze was wide and wary; guarded as he weighed his boss's words. Tony didn't understand kindness from Gibbs-he never had. Normally that worked. Gibbs knew it was probably because of the way Dinozzo had been raised, and was sure that some therapists would have a field day diagnosing all of their issues. He didn't give a damn. It was how they did things. But he couldn't bring himself to be "normal Gibbs" right now.

His thoughts skittered away and he patted Tony on the arm, and then wandered over to the window, thinking of Ari. He'd spent ridiculous amounts of time thinking about the man over the past months. Obsessing, was more like it. He'd wanted, more than anything, to catch the man who'd come to his territory and held his people hostage, all with a smile. Instead, the man had killed Kate and gotten away. He'd won.

Later, Gibbs walked in the rain, a mostly untouched cup of coffee from the corner shop in one hand. He found himself unable to stop thinking about his team…what was left of them anyway. Tony had held it together today for the most part, showing McGee a lot more patience than Gibbs had expected. There was a snide comment about the damage done to Kate's head following the gunshot, but other than that, Tony had been surprisingly quiet. It was discomforting, because quiet was not Tony's normal routine. He held a lot of the more dangerous emotions inside: anger, rage, and pain. Gibbs suspected, and knew for a fact in many cases, that Tony had a lot of all three inside him. But rarely did they surface. In fact, he was a lot like Gibbs himself. Shannon and Kelly…his first wife and only child…were never mentioned in any conversation at work. Only Ducky knew about their existence and about the horrible way that they had died. But Ducky thought that Gibbs had replaced the loss of his wife and daughter with Kate, when in reality, Tony and Abby were closer to representing his lost family. Abby because-well, because she was Abby. She was easy to know, easy to respect, and easy to love like a daughter. Tony? Tony was tougher to explain. He had never had a son, after all. But he was so easy to care about, even though he didn't seem to understand his own worth. Gibbs wanted more than anything to meet Dinozzo Senior, although he wasn't sure if he'd talk to him about how important Tony was or punch the man in the jaw. Tony had never discussed his childhood with Gibbs following the conversation in his hospital room while recovering from the plague, but Gibbs had never forgotten it. How could he forget the fact that his senior agent-confident, womanizing, annoying Dinozzo-had been a scared kid for most of his childhood? And that knowledge, paired with the conversation Gibbs had endured with Abby about Jeffrey White, had put Gibbs into protective mode.

Gibbs smiled wryly. He could guarantee that right now, Tony was down in Abby's lab. They had most likely snarked at each other and then hugged. His bet was that his two "kids" were holed up together and listening to Brain Mush or whatever the hell Abby had in the ipod port right now. His forensic scientist was really very good at reading Tony's moods and interpreting them properly.

The sound of the bullet whistling past his ears nearly stopped his heart in his chest. For an instant, he was frozen. His brain couldn't process the concept of what was happening. Finally (very quickly, although in his head it felt like hours), he realized two things: the shot had come from Anacostia Park, and it had gone in one of the window to Abby's lab. Immediately, he took off, coffee lying on the pavement, slowly diluting in the furious rain storm.

His heart pounding so loudly he could almost hear it, he rushed down the steps and hit the lights. At the sight of Tony and Abby, very much alive, he nearly fell down and wept. Tony hissed, "We're taking fire!"

"Go tell metro to close off Anacostia Park! It's a crime scene now." Tony nodded and made to get up. Gibbs yanked him back down, ignoring the unmanly squeak that he startled out of the younger man. "What if he has a night vision scope?" Tony nodded again. "And when you are done with that, Dinozzo, see Ducky and get checked out. If I don't get the ok from him, I am pulling you off field duty. I'll be checking with him in two hours, so make it a damned priority, got it?"

Tony's reluctant, "On it boss" trailed behind him as he left. Gibbs made his way to Abby, feeling her tremble as he put his arm around her. "You ok?" he asked softly.

"Thanks to Tony. He saved my life." Even her voice was shaky. Despite Abby's nearly constant interaction with the results of violence, she very rarely dealt with brutality on a personal level. "What's he doing, Gibbs? Picking us off one at a time? Why?"

"I don't know, Abby. But we'll keep you safe, Abs. Don't you worry. You'll be ok."

"I'm not worried about me. Well, not really. You guys will look out for me. But who's gonna look out for you, Gibbs? For Tony? Timmy?" She sighed.

"We will look out for each other. We'll be fine. And we'll get Ari." He knew his voice had hardened. But Ari had killed a damned fine agent. Had scared his forensic scientist. And now, the man seemed to be taunting them. It had turned into a vendetta, and Gibbs was determined to win the endgame.

"Jethro. What can I do for you?"

Ducky's normally chipper voice was subdued, and Gibbs knew it was because of the body he was currently dealing with. Gibbs took a deep breath in. Held it. Then let it out, reminding himself why he was here. "Dinozzo been down to see you, Ducky?"

"No he hasn't. What's going on, Jethro? Was Anthony injured? When did it happen?" Ducky's questioning was surprisingly brusque, and Gibbs wondered when Ducky's annoyance with Tony had turned into respect and admiration. Most people didn't look under the polished and shiny surface of Tony Dinozzo and see the excellent person he truly was. Ducky had clearly figured it out.

"Nothing new, really. He just returned to week a full week before I would have if I had contracted the plague, got nearly blown up by a car bomb, watched his partner die, spent hours in the cold rain looking for a clue, and saved Abby's life when Ari fired into her lab. I would like to make sure that he is ok to continue working in the field."

"I thought it was far too soon for the boy to be at work. His lungs will certainly never be as strong as they once were, and after only one of the events that you mentioned, he could have suffered a serious setback. You send him down and I will take care of it, Jethro." Ducky looked at him shrewdly. "What else is on your mind, my boy?"

"Ducky, have you noticed anything about Tony in the last six months or so?"

"I have noticed several things, Jethro. Your senior agent is an fascinating individual. Could you be a little more specific?"

"You checked him out after the Jeffrey White case. Cleared him then after a few stitches to his neck. How would you describe his frame of mind at that point?"

Ducky stared at him for a minute. "Why are you asking about that now?"

"Humor me, Duck."

"As I recall, he was…well, I guess you would say he was twitchy. Insisted that he was fine, and he would only let me put the stitches in. He was very strongly against my examining any other part of his body and he said he was fine. It reminded me of…"

"Of what?" Gibbs prodded when Ducky's voice trailed off before he could expound with a story.

"I'm not sure why I thought of that anecdote, Jethro. Please disregard it."

"Ducky…"

"Oh well if I must. It reminded me of a young man who came to me when I was working in an emergency room in Edinburgh during my residency. He'd been accosted after a night out pub trawling. The man had mugged him and made off with his wallet and car keys. During the encounter, he'd been cut above his eye, and stitches were required. It was as I finished with them that things went haywire. I put my hand on his shoulder from behind because I wanted him to turn closer to the light."

"And?" Gibbs was not used to having to prod the medical examiner for stories.

"And he leapt from the table and pushed me away, while screaming at me to leave him alone. It did not take much questioning on my part to ascertain that the poor fellow had lost far more than his money and his keys. He'd been a victim of a sexual assault as well. Oh dear."

"Yeah." Gibbs acknowledged his friend's conclusion.

"Oh the poor boy. However did you find out? I cannot believe that Anthony would tell you something so deeply personal and painful voluntarily." Ducky's voice shook.

"Abby figured it out. Confronted him about it and he admitted it, then told her if she didn't leave it alone, he'd quit." Gibbs rubbed his hand against the back of his neck.

"I am certain that he would do that. He lives by his reputation as a ladies' man. If people found out about this, he would not be comfortable with the mask he uses. Does he know that you at least are aware? It could really help him to come to terms with the experience if his mentor knew about it and still accepted him."

"Or, he could leave," Gibbs countered.

"True." Ducky nodded in concern.

"I want you on Ziva's ass." Gibbs winced at he said it and waited for the inevitable. He didn't have to wait long.

"She's not really my type, Boss." Gibbs absently smacked Tony on the back of the head.

"Tail her."

"I knew that."

Gibbs stopped for a moment. Then, praying for the best, he lifted Tony's chin and forced the younger man's head up. "Tail her, Dinozzo, and do what you have to do. But don't get in too far. The last thing I need is another day where we track you all over the country while you are handcuffed to a serial killer."

Now that he knew to look for it, the pain was deep and black in Tony's eyes as he remembered the Jeffrey White case. Gibbs held Tony's gaze for a long moment. He allowed the empathy and knowledge of what he knew to shine through and heard Tony take a deep breath. "You never have to make that kind of sacrifice again. Never."

Tony's eyes widened and he drew in a deep shuddering gasp. Gibbs waited patiently. With a strength that Gibbs didn't know he had and most people would agree with him, Tony pulled it together. Gibbs was proud of the boy.

"On it, Boss."


End file.
